Eight questions I’d love to ask my toddler

June 15, 2012

You’ve probably wondered what cats and dogs would say if they could talk, right? Well I often wonder what my toddler would say if I asked him some questions. And as he goes through his stages, my questions differ – from “Are you laughing at me or with me when I pull funny faces?” and “Why do you poo as soon as your nappy is off?” to “What does it feel like when I don’t buy you another truck?”

So if I could, here’s what I’d ask:

– Max, I adore you and will always try to respect your wardrobe choices, but why do you like wearing your orange truck pyjamas every day?

– Do you realise that you’re wearing pyjamas each day to school?

– How is it that you can go to sleep around 10pm, and wake up around 7am? You seem to function with a lot less sleep than others.

– When you run away from me at the park, for example, is it simply for fun, or is it about the chase too?

– Why do you pull the cat’s tail and chase her around, even though you *know* the consequences?

– Why do you hate the food mixer so much? Did something happen that you cry and hate it?

– Why do you always dip your hands into my glass of water, when you have your own?

– Why do pecking orders for toddlers exist? ie I’m top on your favourites list, then the bottom? Is it in proportion to presents bought/fun had/time spent?


What would you ask you child if you could?

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